Introduction

The gradual progress of digital

technology has had a great

impact on our love lives. With

the easy access to the

internet on our smartphones,

online dating and virtual

relationships are now just a

tap away. Romance has taken

on a new avatar, which the

people of earlier generations

could never imagine, and

thereby has gone way beyond

the traditional boundaries.

Those days are no more when

people used to write lengthy

love letters for which their

partners had to wait patiently

for weeks or eagerly awaited

the phone calls from their

lovers or crushes for days.

Nowadays, through short text

messages and heart and kiss

emojis, one expresses their

romantic feelings very easily

at any time of the day to their

significant other.

Besides many advantages, the

digital revolution has brought

its own set of disadvantages in

all aspects of our lives,

including dating and

relationships. In this article, all

the complexities of digital love

are explored, which will act as

a complete guide in our love

lives. 

Difficulties in preserving real connections

Although the rapid progress in

technology has helped some of us find

our perfect matches, culminating in

marriage, from the comfort of our homes,

there are others who endure many

challenges in maintaining authentic

connections in their lives. Let’s discuss

the kinds of difficulties one faces in

preserving real connections in Digital

love.

Lack of face-to-face communication:

In the Digital Age, couples have a

tendency to send text messages or chat

when they are facing problems in their

relationship instead of having a face-to-

face conversation. Thus, it makes them

unable to resolve their issues or create a

close relationship due to a lack of

mutual discussion and understanding.

So, technology is ruining many

relationships even before their

formation.

Unwanted Distractions and

Addictions:

There are so many distractions in this

era. Thanks to technology’s unique

inventions, that also includes

smartphones, which have become an

essential part of our lives. Nowadays, it

is a common sight to see people

scrolling their smartphones, even when

they are with their partners. Not

preferring to spend some quality time

together, the constant distraction with

smartphones is wrecking up

relationships for many couples. Mobile

gaming and porn addictions among

people are creating anger and

disappointment in their partners,

leading to frequent fights. These

addictions are also causing rifts with

their friends and family members.

FOMO Syndrome:

FOMO, which stands for ‘fear of missing

out’ is common among people since

technology has compelled them to post

captivating pictures of their lives and

families every time on their social media

accounts, even when the reality is

different. As a result, it is causing a lot of

pressure among people, affecting their

self-esteem and relationships. The social

media influencers are also largely

responsible for this due to their

seemingly perfect posts that depict their

beautiful pictures, ideal relationships,

lifestyles and successful professions,

thereby creating low self-esteem and

anxiety among people.

Superficial Connections and Infidelity:

On social media platforms and dating apps, people

get interested in the exterior qualities of an individual, such

as their appearance and status, by mere swiping. Thus,

connecting with people and exchanging sweet messages,

love, quotes and emojis without meeting them personally

can pose a threat as it gives us a false sense of intimacy. The

person on the other side of the screen can easily avoid

uncomfortable, genuine, emotional conversations, which is

not possible in private meetings. Technology is also offering

many opportunities for infidelity, as it is very easy to connect

with individuals secretly outside their relationship, resulting

in intimate communication and adultery.

Online Harassment:

Nowadays, cyberbullying, trolling and online harassment are

very commonly heard issues faced by almost everyone since

anyone can get involved in such malicious activities by

keeping themselves incognito. Further, a jilted lover or ex

can harass you by sharing your intimate photos and videos,

or your fake photos and videos, online.

Disconnection and Depression:

Too much involvement in social media platforms and online

gaming makes an individual wary of giving attention to their

family and loved ones. They enjoy a fake virtual life and

relationships by ignoring their responsibilities and one day

they suddenly discover themselves very lonely and dejected,

leading to serious cases of depression.  

Five Strategies to Get Past the Barriers in Digital Age Relationships

Five effective ways to overcome relationship barriers are:

Limit your technology use:

Consult with your partner about your concerns about the

use of technology in your relationship and set a healthy

boundary. For instance, stop using phones during meal

times, like dinner, or your intimate conversations in the

bedroom. Both partners should abide by this rule.

Engage in face-to-face conversations:

Don’t check your phone and avoid other distractions while

having private conversations with your partner. Spend

quality time with your partner and create an intimate bond.

Involve in Joint Pursuits:

Engage in joint activities like playing board games, taking

long walks, working out in the gym, cooking, watching a

movie in a theatre, or watching Netflix. If you have kids, play

with them. Gradually, you will grow close to your family.

Be actively physically present with your partner:

Try to be physically present with your partner whenever you

save some time from your work. Actively listen to their

conversations, dreams and requirements. Give them

emotional support during their times of need. Understand

each other’s gaze, gestures, body language and tone of voice

to establish a genuine and intimate relationship.

Proper use of technology to strengthen your

relationship:

Physically apart couples, or those involved in long-distance

relationships, can maintain intimacy in their relationship

through video calls, instant messaging and social media

whenever they feel like sharing their thoughts, everyday

activities, triumphs, sadness, worries, etc.

FAQ

How can we maintain the privacy of our romantic

relationships in a culture that is obsessed with

oversharing?

Keeping your relationship private doesn’t mean keeping it

secret. But it is not essential to post every detail of your

relationship in pictures, videos and texts on social media. It

draws unwanted attention from people and turns your

relationship into a commodity of entertainment for them. So,

limit your romantic posts.

Does Digital Communication improve relationships?

Yes. When physical presence is not possible, digital

communication is the only way to maintain the bond, which

grows stronger day by day.

How can couples strengthen their relationships with

technology?

Digital Calendar- One can make some important entries

here, such as their unique date nights, the birthdays of their

partners, movie dates, communication sessions and many

more, so that nothing misses out.

Text messages and Voice Notes- One can send sweet text

messages and voice notes throughout the day to make their

partner feel loved and important.

Video Call- When physically apart, couples can video call

through Skype, Whatsapp, Facebook, etc. to have intimate

conversations that will keep the spark alive in their

relationship.

Facebook Official- The couples can make their relationship

official on Facebook, which makes them more committed to

their relationship.

How can you handle jealousy and insecurity in the

Digital Age?

Limit your social media use and engage in healthy, honest

and open conversations with your partner to clear all doubts

and maintain transparency and emotional security.

What are the indicators of a toxic Digital relationship?

The indicators are discussed below-

1. Manipulating your decisions, emotions and actions.

2. Showing extreme feelings, which includes unrestrained

texts, calls, etc.

3. Exhibiting possessiveness and jealousy when someone

controls what you post on social media, tracking your

location through their device without your consent, etc.

4. Sabotaging your image by accessing your account without

your permission, unfriending your friends, deleting your

emails, etc.

5. Making you feel guilty for your actions, trolling you and

criticizing your posts, etc.

Conclusion

Technology has eased our lives in many ways and our love

lives and relationships have greatly benefited from the

advent of Digital Age. But we should not overuse technology

in our lives, especially in matters of the heart. Do we only

depend on technology in our profession while totally

discarding our brain and thought processes? The answer is

no. Similarly, emotional bonding, intimate and honest

conversations, physical warmth and close friendship are key

features of a relationship where the hearts and minds of

both partners are in sync. Technology can lessen their

longing and yearning through text messages, video calls,

photo sharing, etc. when physical presence is not possible.

So, one should understand its proper use to avoid

unnecessary trouble and depression in their lives. When

someone is trying to sabotage you, block that person

immediately on all platforms. If you become a victim of

cybercrime, report it to https://cybercrime.gov.in/ , or you

can visit the nearest police station. If you get into depression

due to relationship issues, you can go for counselling or dial

the toll-free number 1800-599-0019 from any part of India to

seek professional help.